Remember Me..........

Remember
I will still be here
As long as you hold me
In your memory.

Remember
When your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended
Just remember me.

I am the one star that keeps burning so brightly
It is the last light to fade into the rising sun
I'm with you whenever you tell my story
For I am all I've done.

Remember
I will still be here
As long as you hold me
In your memory.
Remember me.

I am that warm voice in the cold wind that whispers
And if you listen, you'll hear me call across the sky
As long as I can still reach out and touch you
Then I will never die.

Remember
I will never leave you
If you will only
Remember me
(remember me)

Remember
I will still be here
As long as you hold me
In your memory.

Remember
When your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended
I live forever
Remember me.....
Remember me.....
Remember me.

Mom..........

1 year - Mama

4 years - I want my Mama

7 years - I need to ask my Mommy first

12 years - My Mother is so uncool

17 years - Naturally Mother doesn't understand

21 years - Mom is so out of touch - What would you expect?

30 years - A little patience....Maybe Mom will have a good idea

35 years - I'll call Mom and see what she thinks about it

40 years - Maybe Mom and I could do that together

50 years - I wonder what Mom would have thought about it

60 years - I wish I could talk it over with Mom once more

Thoughts at Christmas.....

This shelf holds upon it some of my most treasured things. How simple is that little teddy bear or the container of broken pussy willow branches; gold watch that wraps the bears neck and the family expressive picture above. That tiny, little Christmas tree, with it's old silken and wrinkled poinsettias, much too large for such a tiny little tree. Anyone to walk past, who did not know me well, would probably not stop and take much notice of these things but for a simple glance. But, as i do often when passing by this shelf, i'll stop for awhile. My finger might gently touch the soft small pussywillows but with such care, as over time they become so fragil. So often, i've picked up that little white teddy, put it against my nose and inhaled it's scent as deeply as possible. It does begin to fade now but I still pick up it's so precious aroma. There is a gold watch that wraps the Teddy's neck...its hands remain on 11:05, where they ceased March of 2005. I watched them slow and waited for the moment in which they would stop. I told myself at that very moment, my mother was now happy in heaven.

The pussywillows, picture and teddy with her watch, always remain in place. Christmas i put her the small tree beside them, as i have done for the past two Christmas's. This Christmas was no different. I'd come to this shelf and touch with ease, and smell her scent and remember her. Still, a tear would spill but her memory is needed much more in that moment. In each touch, and in each moment her scent fills me, i feel her for that moment still near me. And so, wrapped in her memories my Mother always lives on, within me.

That little tree, I remember having many laughs over with her. She did not want to bother decorating for Christmas. She has no interest in it at all. Her trees became smaller and simplier each year. So on her table, she'd put that little Christmas tree and that was that. She'd joke after Christmas had passed about having to "take down the tree" and put it away. As though, it was going to be an all day affair with her work cut out for her. And now, i have that little tree and like her, i put it out each year and think of her. She always had such a wonderful sense of humor.

The broken pussy willow branches that i keep are from her hospital room where she passed on and one from the first anniversary of her passing. In her memory, her garden is surrounding in pussywillow bushes, which are the first signs of spring here.

All of these things have been healing to me. Our mother is still such a part of our lives, every day.

Winter Wonderland...I wonder.....

Snow, light and fluffy, heavy and wet...snow, sleet, freezing rain, ice and more snow...we've had it all and its only January 1st! Happy New Year! We're being buried here....

Already, we've broken records, and it never seems to stop. This picture, showing the "Love" stand, next to a bush, is now buried, unseen. Gone. Oh well, its winter in New England... the kids love it, the skiers love it....and its beautiful to watch as long as you don't have to drive in it.

I've missed alot of writing on here...many holidays and events.....Thanksgiving was wonderful this year. We went away for it, for a change. For a change, the dinner was made and i, did not make it. Was a beautiful day, spent with my sister-in-law and her boyfriend, at his new home which is almost finished. Was great company and good food.

Christman also has come and gone. Always a hectic time of year for us all. For the first time ever, I managed to do what I had always said I'd do...I got my shopping done two weeks before Thanksgiving. Though, was still wrapping it the night before Christmas. I'm glad its over.

And here it is, New Year's Day. A dinner of lobster and fresh baked stuff scallops was planned, until I came down with the flu the night before. I managed some soup. I've watched the snow plows most of the day, go by plowing and sanding. About another foot of the white stuff today; where are they going to plow it all?

So here, in a few short paragraphs, I've managed to catch up some. Its been awhile since I've written. i don't know whats been up with me for the past few months. Writer's block? Mental block? On over load with all the other things going on? Who knows. But, i try.